hates - everything

I’ve masturbated too many times today, my penis is kinda sore and my ejaculations are just really not even worth the effort any more. But I guess this is what days off are for. 


I’ve been feeling really poorly recently, the infection in my wound is draining me of all energy, plus this heat is horrible! I just want October.

im so thirsty but i am comfy in bed and my drink is JUST out of arms reach, looks like i will have to go without then…


things your friends will say if you’ve made a good pun:

  • get out
  • fuck you
  • shut the fuck up
  • oh my god why
  • you need to stop
  • you’re not funny
  • that was terrible

(via faithandfury)